A List Of People I Hate On A Plane

The good thing is: I normally fall asleep before departure. The bad thing is: there are still people who really annoy me during a flight.

My ultimate list of people I hate on a plane:

Inaislestanders: on every flight. Before departure and after landing. I really don’t know why it’s so difficult to store hand luggage  in the overhead lockers or why it takes so long to get all the stuff together you need. And then, after landing: boom. Plane is on the ground. Maybe I didn‘t get the memo in which they say you have to stand up in exactly THIS second…

Armresttakers: Zack, peng, armrest is lost. Is someone sitting next to me? Can’t be. I paid for the flight so I can claim every armrest in a 2-meters-radius around me. And while we’re at it, also half the seat next to me. Privacy? Not next to me, darling!

Newspaperspreaders: Same species like the armresttakers. Got a free newspaper – MUST read it. FULL RANGE.

Noisemakers: Worst case: whiny children. As annoying as cheeky teenagers or chatterboxes, lack of anything better to do than to tell the whole plane their whole life. Also not good at all: people clearing their throat AGAIN and AGAIN.

Scentmongers: Uhhh, someone was in the duty free shop and sprayed himself through ALL the parfums. Or: (even worse) forgot out of 100ml regulation-confusion to use deodorant in the morning.

Clappers: After every landing I do have one second of fear… is someone clapping? Oh hell, yes. People who clap in a plane shall please also applaud the bus driver at the final stop.

Chickenouters: Every jerking he clings to the armrests OR even worse he sits behind me and shakes my seat back every time the planes wiggles. It’s almost that bad like watching a horror movie in cinema and the person next to you jars every time something happens. WORST CASE: a chickenouter watching a horror movie during a long distance flight.

Did I forget someone? Do you know any other persons to hate in a plane?